Hair Is Like A Relationship

Hair is like a relationship.

You know how it feels to cut off hair -- whether it’s due to damaged ends or for a new look.

Your cut startles you; it’s different.

You may feel pain because you aren’t used to the shorter length.

Or you may be excited for a chance to start over.

The process may have been long and drawn out due to the desire to hold on.

Or it may have been swift with no wish to look back.

There may be regret, rejoicing, or some mixture of both.

When you cut a person off,

Things are different; you aren’t used to their absence.

You may feel insecure, or you may be happy to finally get rid of someone who was ultimately holding you back.

You may have a mix of feelings: perhaps anxiety and lament at first, then peace.

Hair is like a relationship.



Hair might grow back, it may be very similar, but it’s never the same hair that you cut off.

It can never be the same.

That hair is forever gone.

You may remember the length, the texture, and the color, but that’s all it will ever be -- a memory

Sometimes the new hair growth may be successful.

You’ve learned from previous experiences, to readily moisturize before the arrival of split ends.

You dedicate time to deep conditioning. You carefully brush each strand. You learn protective styles. You don’t risk sleeping without a bonnet or silk scarf, and you might even see a dermatologist for greater help.

Other times the hair growth is just as bad, or worse, than the original.

You didn’t devote time to actually learn about your hair. Instead, you continue to utilize products that don’t work. You repeatedly apply heat without adequate preparation. You aren't actively taking care of your hair while using protective styles.

When you grow from an old relationship,

You might grow by finding new people to replace old ones.

You might grow by attempting to mend the broken relationship.

You may be successful and become reunited again, but the relationship will never be identical to the previous one. Even after forgiving, you will never forget the conflict. It will always remain. It is successful because you incorporate helpful methods, like having conversations before conflict hints, seeking professional help, and never staying angry after the sun goes down.

And then it may not be successful, as you don’t modify your thoughts and actions for the relationship.

Hair is like a relationship.



The hair might not grow back.

You may choose to keep the short hair.

Maybe it’s because you like the look, you don’t want the troubles of longer hair, or you’re happier.

It could be that it simply will not grow back, no matter what you do.

In this case, you may eventually accept it and remain content with the length you have.

Or worse, you never move on.

You continue to long for a length you may never have.

You put more and more energy into growing the unresponsive hair, and the stress leads to additional problems, like hair loss. When a relationship is forever gone, it could be for the better, and you prefer to keep your circle short and small.

Or it could be for worse, because no matter what, you will always fall for someone who won’t attempt to catch you, hurting yourself in the process,

It’s been two months since we’ve last interacted. They say hair grows half an inch a month. You may no longer be around, but I’ve grown an inch.

Hair is like a relationship.


Damilola Oke